Chapter 1: The Power of Community

I recently discovered the remarkable ways in which female elephants safeguard their companions. When danger approaches or when one of them is giving birth, a group of lady elephants forms a protective circle around the vulnerable mother. They stomp their feet, generating a cloud of dust that obscures the sight and scent of any potential predators. Upon the arrival of a new calf, they celebrate by raising their trunks and trumpeting joyfully. Their actions exemplify the essence of community, where members uplift each other.

This observation sparked a question: How much time should we dedicate to being part of community groups?

In a culture that often champions individualism, engaging with a community can sometimes feel burdensome. Many people juggle demanding 9-to-5 jobs, lengthy commutes, and family responsibilities, leaving little room for socializing. After a tiring day, it’s common to unwind in front of a screen, often with a drink in hand. Interestingly, the United States ranks as the highest consumer of television worldwide.

Yet, watching TV rarely constitutes a community experience—unless you consider binge-watching children’s shows like Coco Melon a communal activity. While our family units provide some level of connection, they are not the only form of community that fosters our well-being. To truly thrive, we must step away from our couches.

A community is fundamentally a sense of camaraderie with others, rooted in shared attitudes, interests, and aspirations. This feeling of togetherness mirrors the elephants’ protective instincts. Sometimes, we may feel a sense of connection while lost in our favorite TV shows, becoming attached to characters like Olivia Pope or the Pearsons. However, this pales in comparison to the depth of real human interaction.

When we can express our beliefs, interests, aspirations, and dreams to others in a safe environment, we experience a profound sense of fulfillment. We feel acknowledged and understood—qualities that a television show simply cannot provide. Even virtual assistants like Alexa fall short in offering that essential sense of community. But in our busy lives, how can we carve out time for genuine connections?

Indeed, we often find ourselves caught in a cycle of busyness and inertia. So how do we prioritize connection?

Here’s a thought: Whatever activities you enjoy, seek to cultivate a community around them. Consider your daily routines. If you like walking, join a walking club. If journaling is your passion, try working from a café. Love cooking with your Instant Pot? Participate in a recipe-sharing group. Although these individuals may not be present during significant life events, they can provide invaluable support during your everyday experiences.

Being surrounded by others gives us a sense of belonging, making it worthwhile to invest time in building connections. My grandmother once initiated a women’s group where members would bring their darning projects—essentially mending clothes—while enjoying each other’s company. As my mother noted, “There was too much work to do, so they’d bring it along while they chatted.” Blending responsibilities with social interaction reduces feelings of isolation.

Personally, fostering connections has not only helped me overcome alcohol addiction but also enabled me to maintain my sobriety. Recently, I joined an online sobriety group that convenes virtually at our convenience. Through this platform, I’ve formed lasting friendships with remarkable individuals from around the globe. Technology has expanded my community far beyond my immediate family and local neighborhood. Even simply being around people can ignite inspiration.

I particularly enjoy writing in airports. Yes, I might be the only one who does! However, the ebb and flow of travelers heading to various destinations captivates me. We are all on our unique journeys, and observing humanity in motion can be a source of inspiration.

Once, I witnessed a humorous exchange at security when a man attempted to send his cat through the x-ray machine. The TSA officer dryly responded, “Sir, you cannot put a cat through the x-ray machine.” The man replied, “Well, what do you want me to do with it?” The officer simply said, “Take the cat out of the bag.” This moment encapsulated the delightful unpredictability of human interaction, and yes, I ended up writing about it.

So, if fostering connections is vital for enriching our human experience, how can we get off the couch and discover our tribe?

1. Create a Life Goals List

   Jot down activities you wish to pursue. Call it a bucket list, but don’t wait for retirement. Focus on your interests—music, films, cooking, or travel. As you compile this list, certain items will resonate with you, guiding your next steps.

2. Explore Online Communities

   Seek out digital groups aligned with your interests. Whether you’re pursuing a fitness goal or exploring hobbies, there are numerous online communities available. If you enjoy reading, consider joining a book club (I may be biased, as I run one!).

3. Trust Your Instincts

   Follow your intuition regarding what to join or explore. Even if you embark on a solo adventure, like walking the Camino, support groups are often available to offer encouragement.

4. Volunteer Your Time

   If you’re unsure of where to start, consider volunteering. A simple search for local volunteer opportunities can yield meaningful experiences. For example, I recently volunteered with Girls on The Run, a program for young girls training for a 5K. It was a rewarding experience that allowed me to help them recognize their potential, even on rainy days.

Sign up for opportunities and engage! Even in times of social distancing, there are still ways to connect.

Remember to:

• Engage Fully: Share your story and your identity.
• Listen and Acknowledge: Be present for others.
• Be Patient: You might not connect deeply right away, but with curiosity and determination, you will eventually find your community. Just keep showing up.

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Chapter 2: Lessons from Elephants

In this video titled "What can we learn from elephants?", discover the vital life lessons that elephants teach us about community, connection, and support.

The second video, "Importance of Ritual in Elephant Society & Striking Parallels to Humans," explores the significance of community rituals in elephant groups and their striking similarities to human societies.