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Embrace Your Inner Bed Creature™: The Ultimate Life Hack

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Chapter 1: The Bed Creature™ Revelation

We all have those moments when unsolicited advice comes our way, often leaving us exasperated. Just yesterday, an old acquaintance paid a visit to my home for the first time and immediately suggested I declutter by tossing out my beloved books. “You really love books, don’t you?” she remarked, eyeing a small collection beneath the windowsill. Yes, Denise, I do enjoy books. Must we delve into this topic?

Even more frustrating are those who presume to be life coaches, offering hollow advice on how to enhance our existence. It’s particularly irksome when they attempt to profit from their empty platitudes. The internet is flooded with these individuals; the so-called self-help industry resembles a pyramid scheme, filled with charlatans who merely recycle the wisdom of others.

However, I recently discovered something extraordinary that has significantly enriched my life: I have fully embraced the identity of a Bed Creature™. I'm here to guide you on this transformative journey. This is the ultimate life hack.

Did you know that leaving your bed isn’t always necessary? I certainly didn’t! Sure, we need to rise for work, walk the dog, attend appointments, exercise, visit family, grocery shop, and tackle various errands. But when those tasks are complete, I learned that I could crawl back into bed—even if it’s just mid-afternoon, and yes, even on sunny days.

So, here’s the plan: complete your daily responsibilities, then set up an old-fashioned TV tray atop your cozy comforter. Position your iPad on its stand, and indulge in some snacks while you nestle in. You don’t have to leave until the next obligation arises, which could even be a full day later.

My transformation into a Bed Creature™ began with a minor inconvenience. I struggled to download the HBO Max app on my “smart” TV, and with a desire to watch Santa, Inc., I opted for my iPad instead. The dining table felt too formal, so I brought the iPad to bed. Yet, holding it was uncomfortable, leading me to retrieve the old TV tray and sit cross-legged before it.

This setup worked wonders. But then, hunger struck. With the TV tray already in place, I thought, why not bring some food into bed? I had shallow bowls that functioned well for this purpose, making it easy to enjoy a meal while relaxing. Yet, I hesitated—eating in bed felt like a point of no return. I feared I would lose control over my life and transform into someone unrecognizable.

In the hero's journey, crossing a threshold signifies a pivotal moment of change. As I removed my bra, donned a knee-length t-shirt, and settled into bed with my dinner, with my dog Fish curled up beside me, I realized I had entered a new realm. And yes, I understood that there would be no going back.

But perhaps this change isn’t so daunting. My bed is incredibly inviting. I have a down comforter snugly fitting into a duvet cover just a tad too small (a hack for fluffiness, by the way). With a feather mattress topper and a view of bougainvillea and hummingbirds, complemented by the soothing sound of wind chimes, I couldn’t ask for more. Plus, we’re in a golden age of television—what’s not to love?

Initially, I felt guilty. I believed I should be “out there” accomplishing things, and I wrestled with this thought. But then my analytical mind kicked in: Was anyone being harmed? Only myself. Was I causing myself harm? That depended on which version of myself we were discussing. By choosing to lounge in bed, I may be neglecting my more ambitious self. Yet, I’m also nurturing the part of me that is utterly exhausted. If I didn’t allow myself to embrace my Bed Creature™ status, I risked damaging the fatigued version of me. This internal debate continues, but I intend to tackle it while lying down.

I admit there are moments when I might go too far. It’s no secret that I battle depression (and I own it!). Embracing my Bed Creature™ persona can lead me down a darker path if I’m not cautious. I’m currently attempting to maintain a healthy diet, but recently, my craving for sugar drove me to bed with a can of whipped cream, which I squirted directly into my mouth while lying on my side. Not my proudest moment, but in my defense, I had already cleared my kitchen of all “bad” foods.

Yet, for the most part, this lifestyle has been gentle and fulfilling. Surprisingly, my dog Fish has adapted well to this new routine. For context, Fish is my energetic dog, built like a muscle-bound athlete but with a brain the size of a walnut. I anticipated he would miss our outdoor play sessions, but he quickly adjusted. Now, when I start to undress for bed, he leaps onto the bed and gets comfortable, snoring and stretching while eyeing my food.

You too can become a Bed Creature™ and elevate your life by following these steps. (Did I mention I’m now a self-help influencer?)

You Will Need:

  • A cozy bed
  • A TV tray
  • A knee-length t-shirt
  • Some form of entertainment: an iPad for shows, a book, a magazine, etc.
  • Optional: a dog, cat, or any non-human companion (humans may not be ideal due to their tendency to criticize).

Steps:

  1. Identify a problem that feels insurmountable. For me, it was my TV dilemma, but it could be anything that leaves you stuck in indecision.
  2. Remove any constricting clothing.
  3. Slip into a knee-length t-shirt.
  4. Place the TV tray on your bed, about halfway down from the headboard, and set up your entertainment.
  5. Add food to the TV tray, ideally in shallow dishware to avoid spills.
  6. If accompanied by a pet, invite them to snuggle beside you.
  7. Climb into bed. Enjoy your show, read, eat, and pet your furry friend. Repeat until you drift off to sleep.
  8. Remain in bed until absolutely necessary to leave, regardless of sunny weather or time of day. Once you’re back from your must-do tasks, repeat the steps.

As a self-help influencer, I must proclaim: adopting the Bed Creature™ lifestyle will revolutionize your life, just as it has mine! I am living proof! Follow my guidance, and everything will be fantastic! Don't forget to like and share! Share your own experiences of becoming a Bed Creature™ in the comments! Welcome to the Bed Creature™ community!

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Chapter 2: How to Make a Doll Bed for Lagoona Blue

In this video tutorial, you'll learn how to create a charming doll bed for Lagoona Blue from Monster High. This hands-on guide is perfect for doll enthusiasts and crafters alike.

Chapter 3: How to Draw a Monster Under a Bed

This engaging video will teach you how to sketch a playful monster lurking beneath a bed. It’s an entertaining activity for artists of all ages.

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